At this time last year, I was going through one of the most difficult times of my life as I was faced with the reality of my departure from Haiti after having lived there for two years. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that it was God's will and plan for me to leave Haiti, and I had an inexplicable peace about it. But that didn't make it easy. Looking back on my journal entries, I found an excerpt that articulates what I was going through very well:
"I am learning something about peace. Peace does not mean that there will not be pain, or that things will be easy. Rather there is peace in knowing that, not matter the circumstance, I can run to the arms of my Saviour and find shelter in the One who loves me and cares for my heart more an anyone could.... Peace comes in knowing that no matter what changes life brings, God is my Constant. God did not promise ease - He promised to be there when it's hard (and good), and that it will be worth it all."
Reflecting on this past year, I can say with absolute confidence that God has been very near and at work. I got to be present for various significant milestones in the lives of my family members, and I was privileged to spend nine incredible, sacred weeks at Ellerslie Leadership Training in Windsor, Colorado last fall. It was a time of great growth in my relationship with Jesus; I learned more fully what it means when God calls us to live a life of obedience to Him. It is absolutely amazing to think that the One who created the entire universe would wish to call me His child and bring me into fellowship with Him. There is nothing that I possess that He could possibly need, yet He chooses to work in and through me, imperfect though I am! Words fail to describe the wonder of God :-)
Since then, I have had the privilege of working with young moms and their babies at Ramoth House in my hometown, encouraging and supporting them, by God's grace, as they begin the great task of mothering. I've also had the pleasure of learning all kinds of fun little details about the business of fish bait; I had no idea the worms were such complex creatures! It may not be a glamorous side-job, but it has definitely been part of the way God has provided! I know that this is all part of the reason that God brought me back home to Ontario. There are things He wants me to learn and understand that, for whatever reason, I could not in Haiti. It's simply that He leads us all in different ways; I may never fully understand the reasons for the ways God has directed my life and will direct it in the future. But that's why I must live by faith. If there's one thing that I have learned, it is that God's ways are perfect. They are not easy, but they are the best, and there is no place I'd rather be than in the centre of His will. For now, that place is right here with my family, my friends, my church, my co-workers, my community.... I am far from forgetting my beloved Haiti, and am learning to pray for her people from afar, to root for and dream for the little nation that I know God is at work in and has great plans for. One day God may lead me back to work in Haiti, but today He has called me here, and asks me to be faithful in each task.
"Lord, Thou hast been our dwelling place in all generations. Before the mountains were brought forth, or even Thou hadst formed the earth and the the world, even from everlasting to everlasting, Thou art God."
Psalm 90:1-2
